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pjp
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 5:22 am    Post subject: The Queen's House of Ill Repute Reply with quote

lolmonarchy

Cost-cutting ideas for Britain’s Queen Elizabeth II
Quote:
News from Britain: Royal family isn’t balancing the books. Buckingham Palace boiler out-of-date and utility bills sky-high. Royal household told to reduce its costs and increase income.

Now a secret list has come to light, outlining a series of potential austerity measures to help cut costs. Could it even have been written by Her Majesty Herself?

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 5:46 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I have an idea to cut costs, abolish the civil (or whatever it's called these days) list.
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 5:52 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

They could sell some knighthoods, lordships, and orders.

I'd pay a grand or so for an official declaration signed by the Queen legally making me the one an only Duke of Ass or something like that.


Last edited by Bones McCracker on Wed Jan 29, 2014 5:55 am; edited 2 times in total
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 5:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

John-Boy wrote:
I have an idea to cut costs, abolish the civil (or whatever it's called these days) list.


++
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 5:55 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

BoneKracker wrote:
They could sell some knighthoods, lordships, and orders.

I'd pay a grand or so for an official declaration signed by the Queen legally making me the one an only Duke of Ass or something like that.


Arse.
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 6:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Apparently the Windsors are now paid a "Sovereign Grant":
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/queen-handed-pay-rise-5-1806123
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 6:02 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

BoneKracker wrote:
Apparently the Windsors are now paid a "Sovereign Grant":
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/queen-handed-pay-rise-5-1806123


Same meat, slightly different gravy - that £31 million doesn't include security costs either.
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 6:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

John-Boy wrote:
BoneKracker wrote:
They could sell some knighthoods, lordships, and orders.

I'd pay a grand or so for an official declaration signed by the Queen legally making me the one an only Duke of Ass or something like that.


Arse.

How about Viceroy of Vagina?
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 6:16 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

BoneKracker wrote:
John-Boy wrote:
BoneKracker wrote:
They could sell some knighthoods, lordships, and orders.

I'd pay a grand or so for an official declaration signed by the Queen legally making me the one an only Duke of Ass or something like that.


Arse.

How about Viceroy of Vagina?


Didn't mean that the title was a bad idea, just that her majesty would never say ass - has to be ar (hard on the r - helps if you're wearing a monocle) se.
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 8:10 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

:lol:
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 10:32 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ahhhhh, it's great to see jealousy in all its splendour
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 4:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
14) Get more people to pay for honors and titles, especially footballers, except David Beckham, OBE — he’s rather dishy.


Though I think my favorite is #8. I wonder if she'd post selfie mirror shots.
Quote:
8) Talk to Bravo about reality-TV series. Think the Kardashians have problems? Meet the Windsors!
Though I can't say as I ever thought the Kardashians had "problems."
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 6:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Butts McCracken wrote:
Ahhhhh, it's great to see jealousy in all its splendour


Attempt at trolling to one side, I can honestly say that if I were to be offered a peerage - or even (since we're playing make believe) raised to King * JB 1st, I'd refuse.

'Cause you see, the concept is an anathema to me - tis morally repugnant and just wrong.

Seem to remember something about the Duke Of Monmouth and a very v.v.distant family connection - so perhaps it''s not such a huge stretch. Still not interested though.
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PostPosted: Wed Jan 29, 2014 6:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

pjp wrote:
the Kardashians had "problems."


That was probably due to the prosthetics that they made them wear during shooting.
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 30, 2014 7:44 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

This has got to be a joke.... not even Obama is that disconnected.
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 30, 2014 8:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Bigun wrote:
This has got to be a joke.... not even Obama is that disconnected.
It is true. Some people willingly support their monarchy.
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 30, 2014 8:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I can understand the sentimentality for tradition, but it's time for it to be relegated to museum status, like the Beefeaters over at the Tower of London. The "Royals" can give tours and such.
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 30, 2014 10:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Elizabeth Alexandra Mary
House of Windsor
Senior Docent, United Kingdom and the other Commonwealth realms
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 31, 2014 4:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

pjp wrote:
Elizabeth Alexandra Mary
House of Windsor
Senior Docent, United Kingdom and the other Commonwealth realms

She could be senior docent at Buckingham palace.

She could tell stories about how she used to get on the case of the security guards if they ate the nuts.
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