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Bones McCracker
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 24, 2013 9:21 pm    Post subject: Big News: Obama vs. Fly, Round 2 Reply with quote

The American News Media, doing it what does best.

http://www.usatoday.com/story/theoval/2013/01/24/obama-fights-fly-white-house-white-cordray/1862325/
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BonezTheGoon
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 24, 2013 9:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm not sure how to rate which of these three things is the most pathetic: that the article was written, that you felt the need to post it here, or that I actually clicked through and read it.

Maybe it's a wash. Oh shit, now I have to consider if me bitching about it trumps the first three! I better stop now or I'll have to consider all my contemplation on the matter a candidate for the most pathetic as well . . .
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Bones McCracker
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 24, 2013 9:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

:lol:
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 24, 2013 11:40 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Someone needs to edit it and put Boehner's head on the fly...
Quote:
"This guy is bothering me here," Obama said as he swatted away the miscreant.

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PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2013 12:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

pjp wrote:
Someone needs to edit it and put Boehner's head on the fly...
Quote:
"This guy is bothering me here," Obama said as he swatted away the miscreant.


Or the constitution :wink:
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2013 12:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'd imagine the executive washroom has Constitution TP.
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Bones McCracker
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2013 12:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Funny how flies are always buzzing around him, though.
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2013 1:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yet another due-process free targeted killing by the president. This administration's record on civil liberties is deplorable.
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Bones McCracker
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2013 1:12 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

dmitchell wrote:
Yet another due-process free targeted killing by the president. This administration's record on civil liberties is deplorable.

This time he was too slow and it got away.
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2013 1:29 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

In what might have amounted to a costly information security breach; Barack Obama averted the crisis when he remembered to swat at the fly sized spy drone instead of explain how 'friggin' cool' it was. Coolness under pressure stopped him from impulsively explaining how he spent several hours working with the chief engineers in developing a weaponized version of the drones specially designed to buzz their way into civilians' gun safes and detonate...
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2013 1:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

BoneKracker wrote:
Funny how flies are always buzzing around him, though.
Aren't flies usually a harbinger?
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2013 2:04 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

pjp wrote:
BoneKracker wrote:
Funny how flies are always buzzing around him, though.
Aren't flies usually a harbinger?

Yes, of bullshit.
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2013 2:38 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

:lol:
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Bones McCracker
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PostPosted: Fri Jan 25, 2013 4:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

pjp wrote:
BoneKracker wrote:
Funny how flies are always buzzing around him, though.
Aren't flies usually a harbinger?

A whole family of them (Sarcophagidae) are intensely drawn to the smell of necrotic tissue, which they can smell from miles away. They deposit larvae on it, which then grows and feeds on the decaying flesh.

Such flies can be attracted to a healthy, uninjured person if they haven't washed lately, being particularly drawn to areas where the skin cells do not slough off well (e.g. scalp, but also armpits or crotch). This is typically a problem for women with hair weaves (which many will leave in for weeks at a time), because even if they shampoo, they can't effectively wash their scalp, and thick layers of dead skin cells build up. In fact, it's pretty fucking disgusting.

Of course, these aren't the only kinds of flies, and others are attracted mostly to food smells, particularly meat and sweets.

So, Obama either isn't bothering to wash his scalp because his hair is so short, has some other dying tissue on his head (like an open sore), or he's been wiping his hand on his head while he's eating. Or maybe he uses some kind of hair product or aftershave that attracts flies. Or maybe it's from sleeping next to a woman who has a hair weave.

There are some superstitions about flies as well, of course, and they often show up in horror movies (e.g., Amityville Horror).
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