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Bones McCracker
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 1:57 pm    Post subject: I know Kung Fu! Reply with quote

You know that scene in The Matrix where Neo is plugged into the learning machine, and he suddenly says, "I know Kung Fu!""?

If you could have one go at that machine, to learn one subject (of current human knowledge), what would you choose?
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notageek
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 2:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'd learn Kung Fu.
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 2:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

notageek wrote:
I'd learn Kung Fu.


Keanu Reeves wannabe.
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bogamol
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 2:59 pm    Post subject: Re: I know Kung Fu! Reply with quote

BoneKracker wrote:
You know that scene in The Matrix where Neo is plugged into the learning machine, and he suddenly says, "I know Kung Fu!""?

If you could have one go at that machine, to learn one subject (of current human knowledge), what would you choose?


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BonezTheGoon
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 3:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The entire history of the world. Down to every little detail.
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 3:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Modern Physics.
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Mardok45
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 3:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

To learn how to repair a hyperdrive motivator while being chased down by a Star Destroyer.
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Bones McCracker
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 4:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mardok45 wrote:
To learn how to repair a hyperdrive motivator while being chased down by a Star Destroyer.

What, no Vulcan neck pinch? How about a contemporary subject?
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 4:05 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

How to mind-controll Rothschild's & Co.
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nomilieu
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 4:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

My first idea was to choose gaming.
It would be awesome to know how to play every sport or card game ever invented (and be good at them).

On the other hand, kung fu is appealing for self defense purposes, and I assume that would come with knowledge and motivation to stay in shape.

If we're allowed really broad subjects, "computers" could be fun, although it might lead to excessive frustration with the world.

Humor would be another great choice. Imagine if you could memorize every joke ever told!

And that's just the fun stuff. For a serious answer, I may have to choose mathematics.
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 5:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Accountancy.

So long as I didn't have to walk over rice paper, or
burn me arms picking a red hot cauldron up afterwards.
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sikpuppy
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 5:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

How to seduce women.
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nomilieu
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 5:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

sikpuppy wrote:
How to seduce women.

Is that really something you'd ideally need to do more than once? :lol:

(I'm assuming most people are into the whole single partner thing.)
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 6:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

BoneKracker wrote:
Mardok45 wrote:
To learn how to repair a hyperdrive motivator while being chased down by a Star Destroyer.

What, no Vulcan neck pinch? How about a contemporary subject?
Sir! That was a bad joke! Turn in your geek-card right now.

As for a contemporary subject, just people skills in general.

Don't judge me.
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bogamol
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 6:40 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think that most things, the enjoyment of the activity is in the learning how to do it well, so I think that only things that have immediate and/or practical benefit should be picked.
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billium
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 7:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Read music to play the piano.
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Bones McCracker
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 8:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

nomilieu wrote:
sikpuppy wrote:
How to seduce women.

Is that really something you'd ideally need to do more than once? :lol:

(I'm assuming most people are into the whole single partner thing.)

8O

Is nomilieu a female in disguise all this time?
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 8:16 pm    Post subject: Re: I know Kung Fu! Reply with quote

BoneKracker wrote:
of current human knowledge


Makes you wonder what would be possible if you could synthesise
*every* known item about a subject - down to the work in various disparate research
labs.

Are there cures for disease x,y or z out there ? Just needing something or
somebody to start coordinating stuff ?
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nomilieu
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 9:15 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

BoneKracker wrote:
nomilieu wrote:
sikpuppy wrote:
How to seduce women.

Is that really something you'd ideally need to do more than once? :lol:

(I'm assuming most people are into the whole single partner thing.)

8O

Is nomilieu a female in disguise all this time?

Ha.

No, I just meant that something is probably wrong if you have to have special skills to seduce your own wife. Therefore, assuming your intention is to be (at least eventually) married and not swing, then after some point you wouldn't need awesome Neo-like skills for such activities.

Besides, I don't think a magic computer/brain transfer would help my seduction skills all that much. Losing a shit load of weight, now that would help. (I'm down to 190 from 220. It's absolutely amazing how fast you can lose weight when you stop drinking both soda and beer.)
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Bones McCracker
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 9:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Congratulations. Stay with it.
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 9:25 pm    Post subject: Re: I know Kung Fu! Reply with quote

BoneKracker wrote:
You know that scene in The Matrix where Neo is plugged into the learning machine, and he suddenly says, "I know Kung Fu!""?

If you could have one go at that machine, to learn one subject (of current human knowledge), what would you choose?


The question who's answer is "42".

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Prenj
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 9:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

nomilieu wrote:
BoneKracker wrote:
nomilieu wrote:
sikpuppy wrote:
How to seduce women.

Is that really something you'd ideally need to do more than once? :lol:

(I'm assuming most people are into the whole single partner thing.)

8O

Is nomilieu a female in disguise all this time?

Ha.

No, I just meant that something is probably wrong if you have to have special skills to seduce your own wife. Therefore, assuming your intention is to be (at least eventually) married and not swing, then after some point you wouldn't need awesome Neo-like skills for such activities.

Besides, I don't think a magic computer/brain transfer would help my seduction skills all that much. Losing a shit load of weight, now that would help. (I'm down to 190 from 220. It's absolutely amazing how fast you can lose weight when you stop drinking both soda and beer.)


When the company I worked for (too much I must add, was shareholder too, talk about addict) went bust in 2010, I moved to Balkans, and went from 125kg to 92 in one year. No diet, except access to fresh fruits and vegetables (there is still large organic market, traditional kinda), warm climate, plenty of mountains to climb, and lots of water to drink. Haven't eaten anything that comes out of the box or geometrically shaped package in 2 years.
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pjp
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PostPosted: Wed Oct 03, 2012 11:18 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

How fuckin towels work.


If learn implies the ability to effectively apply the knowledge, then something most likely to facilitate early retirement. Economics, investing, poker, etc. Golf! I'd sweep the Sr. Tour.
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PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2012 12:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

How to build a memory upload machine so I can build my own and upload as much goodies as I need.
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PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2012 8:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'd want to learn everything about every helicopter and never forget it.
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